Mothers. Women with dreams, desires, and needs. For the love of their children.
Mothers. Women who decided to sacrifice their careers for their children. For the growth of their children.
Mothers. Women who exchange what fulfilled their lives prior to having children, for raising them and giving up a part of what defined them previously. All for the happiness of their children.
Motherhood. A privilege for many, a life achievement. The happiness in seeing life transmitted in a new generation, seeing them growing into small personalities and being able to carry them in your arms for a part of their life journey. Their small hands in yours, while conveying your values and lessons that life might well face them with. Walking beside them, introducing them to the world they are born into, while trying their best, day by day. However, there is a small silver line, between fulfilling and some perhaps not just pure joyful emotions. The frequent feeling of failing when daily life tasks or circumstances seem to be overwhelming.
Motherhood comes with so many different shades. From pure gratitude of having the chance to be a mother, to sadness and frustration when you feel you can not keep up with what is expected from you. Loneliness. The feeling of guilt, when you hold your tiny creature in your arms, despite feeling you are holding your everything right there in your arms…. you might feel lonely. Those uncountable, endless lonely and dark sleepless nights. Oh, the tears. The exhaustion. The feeling of failure. Those mothers who don’t dare to speak about their thoughts and fears, as they should simply be mothers and grateful for being so. Still a taboo. However, the loneliness some women face when becoming mothers can have a huge impact on them. They feel isolated after their child is born. It can also be perceived as daunting, having suddenly to care for a new tiny helpless human being. This can exacerbate those feeling of isolation. Especially the case for Stay-At-Home mothers. 90% of mothers are experiencing some sort of loneliness, particularly during the first year.
From the moment a woman decides to bring a new life into this world, changes occur. They will never be the same again. The responsibility and the unconditional love for a new creature will change who they are as personalities. The word ‘love’ becomes a new definition. Whatever the image or understanding of motherhood they would have had prior of becoming a parent might change drastically. They might look back on to their own childhood, to their own wounds they have carried with them since their youth. There might be a reconciliation with their own mother as suddenly they can appreciate the struggle their own mother must have endured while raising them.
Everything is out of love. It’s such a short time in a mother’s life that the children are so desperately dependent on them, that they require constant attention. What a privilege to be able to be there, by teaching them your learnt life lessons. Holding your child’s hand tight, cherishing those early years that will be soon forgotten and replaced by an independent growing up person. Collecting memories together all the way along. Soon those memories will fulfil your past.
However, sometimes the decision of motherhood can be out of someone’s control. Circumstances or financial reasons might force someone to juggle a full or part-time job and motherhood. A big burden on a family.
The realization that each mother mostly always simply tries their best in their ability, to bring up what is their most precious achievement in life. And when we fail, it is simply because we did not know how to do otherwise, how to do it better.