Jaap Robben’s depiction of suppressed grief reveals why the fight for equality is not over

The acclaimed Dutch author Jaap Robben was nominated for the international Booker Prize for Summer Brother and its depiction of how innocence is lost, even for people with special needs and when characters struggle to communicate.

In his new book Afterlight, he has artfully explored the social impact of religiously motivated constraints on love. Set in a Catholic Christian community, it shows the lingering emotional impact of suppressed grief, as the main character looks back in old age of the traumatic events of her youth.

Al Majalla spoke to Robben, who is also known for his children’s books, about how and why his writing works, starting with one of its most striking images in his latest poignant novel.

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The book is about the grief of a mother whose child died only minutes after birth. What is the significance in Afterlight of how she recalls the moment she saw her baby's feet?

Frieda Tendeloo is the protagonist of Afterlight. Because she was not allowed to see her stillborn child after she gave birth, every memory is of great importance to her.

The only thing she has seen are the two tiny feet. She saw these little feet sticking out of the cloth in which her baby was wrapped. Because Frieda has no other memories, this memory becomes very important to her.

Nothing compares to a mother's grief over the loss of her child, even if she only sees his foot. Do you agree?

I think her grief even increased by not being allowed to see her child. And not being allowed to hold the baby in her own hands. She wasn't actually allowed to say goodbye to it either. Just because she was not allowed to say goodbye to it, she carried this grief with her throughout her whole life.

How does Afterlight explore the societal pressures faced by women in the period?

From the 1950s to 1980s, stillborn children were immediately removed at birth. Without the parents being allowed to see their baby. This happened mainly in the Catholic part of Western Europe. In the process, women were treated very coldly and distantly. As if it was their personal fault that this baby had not survived.

Until 1962, women were compulsorily dismissed as soon as they married a man. A woman alone could not just rent a room without a husband. In modern Holland, this is hard to imagine. That's why I wanted to write down this history.

I wanted to show that gender equality is not a cause that only women have to fight for. But instead it is a cause that men should fight for, men must ensure that inequality disappears.

How does the alternating timeline between past and present contribute to the novel?

I wanted to show how a past carries over into a later life. When Frieda is in her early 20s, she gets pregnant and her baby dies. But she is forced by her family to keep quiet about this grief.

It is only when she is 81 that this grief suddenly resurfaces. How did she manage to remain silent for almost a lifetime? And why does that grief suddenly surface? That's what I wanted to explore. That's why I wanted these different timelines in the story.

How does Summer Brother explore the theme of family dynamics in a dysfunctional situation?

Summer Brother is a very different novel. In this one, I wanted to describe how two brothers survive together.

How two brothers get to know each other when they cannot communicate, because they don’t have a language. But also how to survive in a place where there is not the right safety, care, love and money.

Brian's relationship with Lucien changed throughout the story. Tell me about the development of that relationship.

We often think that talking is the only way of communication. But so much more is possible. Brian discovers how to understand his brother without words. He learns how to look at his brother.

What prompted you to write a novel about the relationship between a disabled child and his family?

In my society, people with physical and mental disabilities and those without that often live very separate lives. Especially in my childhood in the 1990s.

People often don't understand each other because they don't know each other. I wanted to explore how these brothers get to know each other better, the moment they spend more time together. I would like readers to learn to look at each other better as a result. And maybe in their daily lives feel less distance from someone who may look different from them.

Do you think that some families do not know how to deal with their children, so they prefer to place them in places designated for them?

I know that caring for a family member with an intellectual or physical disability can be very intense and complex. It varies from person to person, from life to life, I don't really have a judgement on that.

You used humour amid the characters' difficult situations; tell me more about the writing stages of the novel.

Humour is hugely important to me. Humour makes things more smooth, it is like a kind of lubricant for a machine. It makes contact easier.

All life is more beautiful because there is humour. That's also why I wouldn't like to be an animal. I think we humans have a rare gift through humour. And I would also like to reflect that in my work.

The film Zomervacht, based on Summer Brother, won the Dutch Film Critic Award. Tell me about your feelings when you watch the movie.

It's great to see the film. To see everything I came up with on screen. The actors are very impressive.

Joël in't Veld plays the role of Lucien and he did a great job. Because he has a physical disability himself, he didn't have to play it. As an actor, he could really concentrate on his role.

It is very special to see my characters, the places, to see everything on screen.

Biography of a Fly is a graphic novel about the very short life of a fly, what idea did you want to convey to the reader from this book?

I find flies very dirty animals. So I wanted to write about this animal so I could make it more important.

I wanted to show that even the smallest life has a story in it. By telling a story about a fly's whole life. You don't dare kill one after that.

Biography of a Fly has been adapted for the theatre. Tell me more about this project due to be performed in December?

The book was brought to the stage by theatre group the Horde in Nijmegen. But as a monologue. In the book, a friendship between a buzzard and a fly plays a main role. they have done a very good job of translating that into a performance.

In your first novel, You Have Me to Love, do you think that the mother's grief affects her son Mikael and their life on the island?

That's what the whole story is about. How grief affects her son. It is not intentional on the part of the mother. But the grief for her missing husband is so great that she cannot stop it.

And Mikael feels responsible for his father's disappearance. So he doesn't dare say anything against her accusation.

Most of your literary works deal with the idea of family from several angles: the loss of a father, the loss of a son or son of a special nature... To what extent do family and human relationships occupy your mind?

I find family ties very interesting. You can pick your friends, but you don't pick your family. Because you always stay attached to each other, that bond is very special.

There are expectations towards each other and there are wishes. But it is therefore also the most complex bond there is. We can never separate from each other either. No one is an ex-mother or an ex-brother. You remain family throughout your life, even after death.

The Whole World Wakes Up is an anthology contains of 333 of best children's poems that have appeared in the Dutch language since 1990. It won a Silver Griffel award recognising the best children's books of the year. What the selection criteria for the poems?

We chose the best Dutch poems for children since 1990. Of course, the poems had to be strong in quality. Original. Clever. Funny. Through a good poem, you understand yourself as a reader a little better. We wanted to make a book where you can find all the feelings that exist in a child's life.

Around 10,000 copies of this anthology have now been sold so far, could you give us a quick idea about the state of children's literature in the Netherlands?

Children's literature in the Netherlands is often very daring. And very direct. It has few taboos. Everything can be discussed.

It is a very good mirror of children's lives. Which is why many children feel supported from children's books.

Last spring you have started writing about "small protests" that lack media coverage. How are these different from the large-scale demonstrations we often see in the news, and what unique stories do they tell?

We often see the big demonstrations on the news. But who are the people when only ten people take to the streets? What are they protesting for? Why do they persist? Is anyone listening to them? That's what I wanted to explore.

Protesting is often very brave and important. And I wanted to show that. People often feel support from each other. Or they are very worried about something.

Demonstrations are often very special, because people want to show without violence that they care. That they want the world to be a bit nicer.

Do you have a daily writing routine? Who are your favorite writers? Who reads the first draft of your literary project?

I really enjoy reading the books of Elisabeth Strout, Annelies Verbeke, George Saunders, Manon Uphoff and many other writers. Reading is very important to me. It helps me to think and understand. It helps me empathize with other lives.

To write myself, I especially need rest. And I need silence. So that I can think for a longer period of time. And a cup of coffee, that's where I start every writing day.

I don't usually let others read anything that I write. Because I'm writing my novel for at least two years first, I only let people read something after that.

My wife always reads then what I write. And my editor. They are two mirrors for me. Through them I understand if my feelings about the text are right.